Thursday, December 11, 2008

Draining the life from me

A sure sign that you have taken on too much in life? You fall asleep sitting up in front of your computer. The good news? You eventually slump sideways onto your boyfriend who is sitting next to you on the couch and very kindly proceed to drool all over him. Even the pit bull sitting on the other side of him was nice enough not to drool. I believe though that the pit bull's life is a lot less stressful than mine. This semester has been like a vampire slowing draining the life blood from me and turning me into something I don't recognize. Through my many experiences in life from bartending to business, art has been the one thing I enjoyed consistently. This semester has changed my mind. In looking for a new career I wanted to do something I enjoyed and I looked to art for the answer. With five classes this past semester I discovered that art under pressure isn't enjoyable for me. When forced to create under time constraints I find it to be like test anxiety, my mind just goes blank. I have never experience it until this semester when I have been under pressure to create so much in such a limited time frame. The frustration levels when art is so much work has me thinking that maybe this isn't for me. When your job is to create your mind can't go blank. Nothing is set in stone so I will see what tomorrow brings. All I know for sure is next week will bring me time to sleep. Hopefully for several hours while laying down, in my bed.

1 comment:

Jangrrrrl said...

Try to remember that school is a fabricated structure.....once you get all of this exposure to tools, matrials, processes, etc....you decide in your life what you use, how and when. Breathe. And who decided how many classes a student should take at a time?